Expectations Ruin Relationships

 



Expectations Ruin Relationships

Evangelist S.M. Davis preached our Spring Revival in April of 2016. He preached a message entitled,
and you can listen to it by clicking the title just given.

The whole message was extremely helpful. I certainly recommend that you listen to the entire message, but one of the statements gleaned from Brother Davis' message (which we have utilized much) is, "Expectations Ruin Relationships."

I have been pondering that statement a lot recently.

I typically consider this statement when I become expectant of certain things from others, and then reevaluate and recalibrate my thinking.

Today has been different. I have asked myself this question, "What can I do to prevent others from having expectations of me so that I'm not at fault for a ruined relationship?" My mind began immediately considering being a father to Lydia Grace. (And then other relationships were noted.)

I've established a couple guidelines for myself, and maybe they'll be a help for you as well.

I. Don't just say it, live it! Let's be people who keep our word. For instance, a pastor can preach something, and then not live it. A parent can promise something, and then not fulfill it. We would be better off keeping our mouths shut rather than waxing eloquent with no follow through.

II. Show up! We all know one person can't be everywhere at all times for all people. With that said, we have a wonderful church family that completely understands this about our Pastoral Staff. Our personal families are also very gracious to understand the many sacrifices that ministry places on family time. BUT this isn't an excuse for laziness and denying time to those who need it and deserve it.
For some time now, I have made it part of my weekly plan to execute some sort of task around the home for my "good thing," plan quality time with my family, list out specifics visits for the week the Lord has laid on my heart (or that have been asked for), plan meals with individuals or families for the main purpose of fellowship, etc. If I get the upper hand on expectations, the expectations will not arise, and, therefore, no ruined relationships...rather, strengthened relationships...it's a wonderful thing!

In conclusion, I don't want to set myself up for failure in relationships. I want to be ahead of the game, and if I aim at nothing I will miss every time! I want to show others it is possible to be honestly human, but graciously empowered to live life in a Christ like manner. We can't always stop the expectations that others form about us (i.e. Jesus' disciples expected the second coming Messiah-all the while skipping the first coming), but we can live to show the truth. We can have strong relationships through expectations. We can have peace and unity. We can enjoy the bond of Christ and family.

Thank you for reading!

Blessed Beyond Measure,
Pastor Justyn Smith • Crossroadspeoria.com

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